Review and Giveaway: One and the Same
Two weeks ago, I received an email from Abigail Pogrebin, an identical twin and author of the book One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I’ve Learned About Everyone’s Struggle to Be Singular. Her email encouraged me to check out her book (just published this past October) and asked that I consider mentioning the book to my readers. At first, I wasn’t sure I’d have the time to take on another book (knowing that I’ve still yet to finish a book on time for my monthly book club meetings). But after poking around a bit (here, here, and here), I became so intrigued that I knew I had to get my hands on a copy of her book.
One and the Same tells the story of Abigail’s life with identical twin sister Robin and how their twinship changed as they grew older. But it’s not just a story about the Pogrebin twins. Stories from many sets of identical twins and other experts (doctors, researchers, authors- some of them twins themselves) are woven in throughout each chapter, allowing the reader a most complete depiction of what twins experience throughout their lives. From these stories, I learned how amazingly safe and secure one can feel with a twin by his/her side, as well as how difficult it can be to constantly feel the need to match and represent the one who shares your same image. But what blew me away were the stories that shared such honest emotions regarding how it felt when the twins separated and began to individuate on their own.
While the story is focused on twinship between identicals, I couldn’t help but notice similarities between the personal stories shared and the interactions I observe daily between Tiny and Buba. I can see how Tiny and Buba cherish their special relationship, but also how they are beginning to individuate already. And while I’ve been able to see for a while that it is difficult for Tiny when Buba wants some time away from her, I can now begin to understand why it is difficult for her and what she might be feeling.
I have no idea how Abigail Pogrebin came across my little mommy blog, but I am so happy and thankful that she did. It was exactly the kind of resource I needed to begin to understand how my twins may see themselves, as well as what I can do as a parent to help them develop as individuals.
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Enter my first giveaway to win a copy of One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I’ve Learned About Everyone’s Struggle to Be Singular for yourself! There are four ways that you can earn an entry for this giveaway:
1. Leave a comment on this post.
2. Write a question for the author (who will actually answer questions in a guest post here next week) in the comment section of this post. Ask anything you’d like to know about being a twin or parenting twins.
3. Write a post on your blog, linking to this giveaway post. Then leave another comment on this post telling me that you did.
4. Tweet about this giveaway and/or post about this giveaway on Facebook. Then post your tweet and/or Facebook post in the comment section here (one additional comment/entry for each).
All comments must be left on this post to be eligible to win a copy of One and the Same. All entries must be posted by 9pm (Eastern Stanard Time) on Tuesday, March 16th. Thanks for entering and good luck!
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Full Disclosure: While I was contacted by Abigail Pogrebin and asked to share my opinions of her book with my readers, I was in no way compensated for this post. (I did not even get a free copy of the book).
How exciting! I can’t wait to check it out!
Question: What about school? Stay together or be separated? My twins are boy girl and we are leaning towards together just to make things easier for us, one less teacher and one less different assignment.
I shared about it on facebook! 
I want to read it too, of course.
Thank you for a wonderful and touching review. Chantal, I hope you’ll check out the blog on my website, http://www.abigailpogrebin.com. So many parents want to know how to handle their twins or multiples in school–separate or keep them together? I answer “Dear Abby” questions from readers every Friday, and I have answered the school question.
In twinship,
Abigail
I would love to read the book. At the preschool we are in, all the parents of multiples have decided to keep them together except one. It’s a question I always have for other parents of multiples.
The question I would have is … How were these twins parented? Were the parents opinions included?
Our situation is different in that we have a third child very close in age and in an effort to have her always feel included, we have never talked or acted like there is anything unique about twins … my kids in fact heard the word “twins” for the first time in school this last September and asked us about it.
Anyway, thanks for the review … you did a great job getting my interest
I have been wanting to read this book! You know when I find time to read at all 
I’ve read it as well. With identical boys I found it really interesting.
I read this book a couple of weeks ago. I asked out library to buy a copy so I could borrow it. I loved it. I’d love to own my own copy.
I have a question for the author. I have 4 year old monozygotic twins. Everyone has always told us to make sure they have their own belongings, but we really struggle with this. Not because we don’t want to get them their own things, but because they don’t acknowledge or accept that they don’t own everything together. We never color coded them or their belongings. I never wanted them to feel like a certain color was off limits to them. I thought it would be easier once they picked favorite colors which they did around age 3. We buy things in those colors, but often we hear, “want to switch” on a daily basis as they trade their items back and forth. I can only think of 1/2 a dozen items in our entire house that they claim as their own. In fact, it took us the better part of a year to make them understand that they couldn’t trade toothbrushes every other night and we still occasionally hear the sad, “I wish we could switch” at toothbrushing time. They are incredibly generous with each other and their playmates. I’d hate to quash that generosity in the name of teaching individuality. Any opinions?
Question for author: I have nearly 9 yr old fraternal boys. They are very different children, but *insist* on doing the same activities. Although it’s obvously easier on me driving to one location, I would really love for them to choose a different activity to encourage their individuality. I have suggested several options, but they continue wanting to do “basketball together” or “baseball together” etc. Any suggestions?
[...] few weeks ago, I posted a review of Abigail Pogrebin’s book One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I’ve [...]
Wasn’t it such a good book? I totally loved it